Yesterday was birthday and on this day,2 decades ago, a beautiful young lady, Ms. Winifred Adio, gave birth to an equally beautiful baby girl, she called her Redemptor, she had waited 4 boys before she could get her princess-->moi.
I love to tell the stories and drama around my birth,but today is about my mother.
Its funny how when we are young we cant wait to get old, i remember i used to argue with my mum that she must have forgotten when i was born, and i would add 2 years ahead,and now we joke about it and wish i was 2 years younger instead.
See when i used to stay with my mother, who arguably happens to be the toughest mother on earth...no kidding! She told me i was only going to be able to make some decisions when i started to bring bread to the table, she believed at the age of 20, i would be quite responsible to at least know good from bad, and that is when i was allowed to get out of home and be back by 7pm,and if you happened to be late,you would get a whopping, which would never happen anyway,because you would be trending in the house for a week...so not worth it!!
My very superstitious mother believed, i could get deceived,rapped or kidnapped at anytime of the day, and at night was even worse, as all things evil happen at night, that's why i was never allowed to go out,except to the nearby shops, she only sent the boys far away to the market and if i insisted, i would be allowed out with the boys or even worse with her, and you surely wouldn't want that...driving around and being advised on life,school and men...a teenagers worst nightmare!
My mother is a very intelligent woman, who cant easily be fooled.her CV includes Politician, diplomat, journalist, comedian and mother, she believes her very good sense of humour coupled with a little TV was enough to keep us in house and fully entertained.
On a good day, when she is not grilling me about books and life, we would sit together when she gets back from work, taking tea, cracking jokes and her telling me stories of her childhood and life, which usually sounded so dramatic and we would laugh so hard like the best of friends, i cherish those moments.
I loved school so much, and as much as i hated books,waking up early and the idea of school in general, i always dreaded the holidays, apart from the idea of having good food and watching TV at home, nothing else excited me about going home. As a teenager, my friends would be making all kinds of plans like going for holiday parties,visiting each other and going to the disco,which was a dream in my world.
In my world,depending on our behavior or my mothers mood , for holiday i would either stay home,day in day out,watching TV and doing the usual house work, or go to the village to live with my grand parents.
In the village, there was no electricity,no TV of course and all the kids my age would make dates to meet at the bore hole or in the bushes as they collected water and fire wood. Bored and angry as i was, i would stay home with my brothers,read novels before dark and cook food with my auntie for the boys and grandpa.
My mama is my hero,mentor, husband...you name it,she is my ALL.
As a child and teenager, my mum and i were not the best of friends, i was an excited teenager who just wanted to do everything my hormones insinuated, and as much as i was hampered,spoilt and loved to bits, i wanted my FREEDOM!!
At 23 i finally moved out of my mum's house,yeeeey ...overly excited i had to celebrate. This came as a shock to me and everyone, and after all the civil wars that she wedged in vain, no one could believe she was not going to wedge a world war to stop me, am sure at the back of her mind she knew she had raised a tough cookie and would have to let me go at some point in life.
By this time, according to me i was "ready" for the world, approaching it like a worrier who couldn't wait to strive regardless.
Two decades later, am an intelligent, beautiful, funny, grown, sexy woman, and i have my mother to be thank to. And as a single mum of over 10 children (she is a wonder women i tell you), She taught me to be a tough,sophisticated lady with a kind heart.
And as i go through every beautiful day, making tough decisions and staying with my head held up high regardless of how amazing or terrible life is, i know i would never have made it in this cruel world if my mother had brought me up differently.
I believe that everyone is different, and different people handle situations differently, many people who hear my story, say they would never live under such rules and would have rebelled earlier, and yet there are also some who have lived through more rules and obeyed them all the way.
So as some (including a younger me ) may despise my mother for my very shrewed up bringing, the lady that i am now, loves and respects her mother in every way and is beyond grateful she NEVER broke down and got soft whenever her little girl cried like a baby.
Sometimes i miss my mama so much i wish i was still her little girl, grounded in the house with nothing to worry about but what colour to paint my nails.
I am cut from a different cloth, and i am my Mother's daughter.
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| My beautiful mother. |
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| With my now deceased very comic grandma..May her soul rest in eternal peace. |
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| with grandpa do you see the resemblance? |
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| With my aunties making lunch, on a recent trip to the village to see my grand parents,a place i once disliked, and now the silence and fresh air is calming, it baffles me how much i hated it. |
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| Taking the local brew...aka ajono |
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| My mama and i at a wedding |
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| Me |
I love you soo much mummy
Your child
